"NO SHIRT, NO SHOES, NO SERVICE posted on a storefront?
I remember reading that as a kid and wondering why a sign like that was even necessary? Why would anyone NOT wear a shirt or shoes to the store? Who would intentionally look so shabby and disheveled in a public place?
I have shared in a previous post that there is "a certain liberation in knowing there is nothing new under the sun in my closet." Getting dressed had become as routine as brushing my teeth and I had come to a point where I didn't lament my commitment to this challenge.
"Enter closet, choose something, get on with the day" had become my pattern.
No feelings, no moods, no creativity. Only the weather would guide my process.
When I began this gig back in January, I was oddly excited to get closet creative. I knew if I switched up this scarf with those jeans and that sweater with these boots, and my fave floral dress with a T-shirt atop - I'd get through the monotony of the same old duds.
And that worked. For about 5 months. What happened after that became a bunch of apathy -- dressed down in stretchy pants and flip flops.
I didn't want to think that how I dressed mattered. Because it in the grand scheme of things - it doesn't. But when I was sick and tired of my clothes, (many of which were from a thrift shop in the first place) somewhere along the line I decided to throw in the towel and slap on the totally oversized sweatshirt I borrowed from my Dad's closet. And wear it for days.
Someone. Call the fashion police.
Lock her up and throw away the key.
It got worse. After we moved to the country county in which we reside, I was making numerous trips to the local Dollar General for this, that and the other thing. One day, I had been too lazy get out of my PJs. When that evening trip to the store came, I figured what's the point of getting dressed just to go buy coffee creamer and ziplock bags? Who do I need to impress anyway?
I think the moment I realized I had "let myself go" was at the checkout counter. There I stood. Leopard pajama pants and a mismatched 2012 5k T-shirt & nearly burned out flip-flops. I glanced back and the fella behind me in line was also sporting pajama pants and what can only be described as slipper boots. He was holding a can of beef stew. We smiled at each other and shared our mutual affinity for Dollar General, noting especially the "come as you are" atmosphere.
Such an extreme shift took place. Where I once gave effort to staying fit, clean and stylish, I now more often than not, didn't care. I stopped running and since I "hated" all of my clothes, I often seemed to pick whatever was the highest in comfort but subsequently sloppy and unattractive. Sure, when I had to clean up (church, work, family photos) I managed to look presentable, but the struggle was real, folks.
What is this interesting co-mingle of garments, behavior and mood? Do a few new items of clothing at the beginning of a season, or for a special event motivate me to take care of and feel good about myself?
Should that even be??
Consider the new mom who discovers she can fit back into her pre-pregnancy jeans
or
the kid who finally finds a pair of jeans to properly fit his long legs and skinny waist.
or
the man who wears greasy uniforms all week and dresses in a suit for Sunday church
or
just the opposite... the fella who dons a suit and tie all week and can't wait to leave those at the door for holey jeans and a MSU T-shirt.
or
the gal who reaches her weight loss goals and buys a new wardrobe.
or
the toddler who is so sweetly excited about his light up sneakers.
or
the husband who searches online for top of the line hunting gear.
or
the teenage girl who saved up to buy the prom dress in that perfect shade of gold
I could go on, but the point is- in different ways, we all have a few feels about our clothes. And that's OK when kept in healthy balance. Before this year, I may have bought clothes to make me feel better about my looks/myself/my bad day. At times this year, I've allowed the shopping deprivation to dictate so many things, among them, my mood and self care. Neither one a healthy balance.
Moving forward, it's good to know these patterns and how to keep them in check. I look forward to buying that first new dress and feeling fresh and lovely again. I'll get dressed up for a night out with my husband and he'll be thankful too, that I burned those yoga pants and washed my hair.
More posts from this series:
Contentment, Interrupted
Halfway Home and Finding Fruit
Cold Turkey and Everyone's Hungry
Caramel Colored Loopholes
Life Lessons from First Grade
Blue Light Special
To Be Clothed In Contentment
